BOOK REVIEW: "One Big Happy Family" by Rebecca Walker

I picked up One Big Happy Family, a collection of essays on family and love, because I love knowing the private details of other people's lives, and I love high-quality essays. One Big Happy Family satisfied both urges for me, and like all great collections, the whole is more than the sum of its parts. Editor Rebecca Walker brings together a varied group of writers to share their experiences of family – topics range from open marriage to open adoption, green card marriage to intercultural marriage. Many of the essays have themes of race and culture, and sexuality is construed as more than just a gay/straight binary. This is a book you will want to read straight through – it pulls you in and leaves you rethinking your own definition of family.

Many of the essays have an amusing but earnest tone. Nearly all are positive and strong, written by individuals satisfied by their choices and their family lives, even as they share the difficulties and heartbreaks associated with their families. Neal Pollack writes a standout, hilarious piece on being home with his young son. Z.Z. Packer's entry also shines, explaining the strange reality of having your parenthood questioned by strangers when your child doesn't appear to share your race. Liza Monroy engrosses readers in a story about entering into a green card marriage – while her mother works for the State Department. Dan Savage's essay and Susan McKinney de Ortega's also are memorable parts of the collection.

Some of the stories in the book are of a more informative tone, such as the one from from Paula Penn-Nabrit on home schooling her African-American sons or Marc and Amy Vachon's enlightening essay on equal parenting. We also hear from a proud (and anonymous) sperm donor, interracial and intercultural partners, parents of disabled children, members of large families, adoptive families, and a woman in couples therapy with her sister. As the book winds itself up, you start to wonder if there are any styles of "family" that aren't workable for someone out there. Perhaps that is the point.

With a variety of writing styles and topics that will speak to many readers, Walker's collection is a fascinating read if you enjoy the genre. Despite not quite seeing my own situation in any of the writers', I felt part of the collection – its inclusiveness made me rethink and relabel my own experiences and wonder what insights I would be able to contribute to such a collection. Midway through the book, I began to feel that it was extremely New York and Los Angeles focused, although later essays helped to mitigate that. Issues of poverty were not frequently addressed, either, which was a hole in the collection. However, with the understanding that even the most varied collection can't include everything, I thoroughly enjoyed my time immersed in other people's families.

---Katy Wischow
imagineatrium.com


Check out author Rebecca Walker at www.rebeccawalker.com
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BOOK REVIEW: "I Am Potential" by Patrick Henry Hughes

Probably not the best book for a pregnant woman to be reviewing, the first few chapters of I Am Potential: Eight Lessons on Living, Loving, and Reaching Your Dreams detail the devastation when first time parents find out that their newborn son is far from physically normal and healthy. Patrick Henry was born without eyes and with shortened limbs that limit his upper body range and make it impossible for him to walk.

I moved quickly through those opening paragraphs compelled by a vain hope that right there on page 34 or 35 a miracle would be pronounced - the doctors would realize that in fact Patrick Henry could develop eyes to see the world through and sprout strong limbs to play football with his father. But that was not the story Patrick Henry and his father would, or wanted, to tell.

Instead both father and son alternately tell the reader about Patrick Henry's path through young life --- the operations, the hope and distress, the young boy's selflessness, his courage and in particular, his passion for playing the piano.

The "eight lessons" in the book's subtitle might signal warning bells to those fatigued by the self help genre, and "I am potential" is certainly a classic self help presentation. But at least there's no lecturing here, no guided visits to the depths of your being in the hopes of transforming your soul, no promises of self realization. It's just a simply told tale of lives that would have been less than whole without the determination and open heartedness of a boy named Patrick Henry.


---Niamh Bushnell
imagineatrium.com

BOOK REVIEW: "Cads, Princes & Best Friends: A Tale of Lust, Love & Redemption" A Memoir by Danielle Coulanges

“God answers prayers. Although God’s answer is immediate, the particular way it unfolds may take time.”

When the memoir begins Danielle is living in downtown Jersey City , New Jersey in the 1990s. For the last decade she has allowed herself to be trapped in an unhealthy relationship with a real cad. This is a woman dealing with some heavy self esteem issues; she finally breaks away from this doomed relationship and begins working on recreating her life and ultimately herself. Desperate to start her life over, she needs to find a rewarding career, a loving relationship and a spiritual home.

Danielle is looking for a Christian church that will inspire her to become a more spiritually grounded person. Central to the story is the author’s blossoming faith in God which parallels her growing faith in herself. Her personal growth and spiritual growth are closely linked in this story.

Danielle Coulanges’s first book, Cads, Princes & Best Friends: A Tale of Lust, Love & Redemption, is a raw memoir that reads like you are literally reading pages of her diary and peering into her most intimate world. The author was born in the Caribbean island of Haiti and came to the New York City area at the age of sixteen in the mid 1970's. She's had careers as a fashion designer, entertainer, compliance officer and business woman.

This book is certainly not a roller coaster ride of excitement, but it is a story of a real person dealing with real situations. I think many readers will see themselves in this tale of lust, love and redemption and would recommend this to anyone who needs to make changes in her life or is on a spiritual quest.


---Jennifer Rossi
imagineatrium.com



For more Jersey authors, visit Imagine Atrium's author page.

BOOK REVIEW: "A House in Fez" by Suzanna Clarke

My dream of living in Mexico for a year drew me to read A House in Fez, Building a life in the ancient heart of Morocco, by Suzanna Clarke. Like many of us, the Clarkes went on vacation to an exciting, exotic country and began to imagine what it would be like to live there. The difference is, they took the leap, bought an ancient house in need of major renovation and survived to share their fascinating journey.

Suzanna Clarke is a photo journalist and her writing style is lively, informative and entertaining. Her open-hearted embrace of the Moroccan culture had me thinking it might be appealing to hear loudspeakers calling me to prayer at dawn each day. And I found her adoption of stray cats and abused chameleons truly endearing.

Suzanna and Sandy Clarke are certainly the optimistic, adventurous sort, taking on their renovation project with her high school level French and his smattering of the local Darija dialect of Arabic. Reading this book, I was always eager to learn what happened next, whether they were negotiating with shady inspectors, discovering long buried treasures behind ancient walls or having lumber delivered by donkeys. In fact, the book helped me give my daughter, an interior designer in New York City, a fresh, new perspective in her work. Talking on the phone one day, I couldn't resist telling her, "You think that's bad, be glad you aren't renovating a house in Fez and dealing with runaway donkeys!"


--Jeanne Moren
imagineatrium.com

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BOOK REVIEW: "Blue Genes: A Memoir of Loss and Survival" by Christopher Lukas

The only thing misleading about Blue Genes: A Memoir Of Loss And Survival , a moving tale of how self-inflicted death leaves wounds in the living, is the title. While acknowledging the genetic predisposition towards depression in the title, author Christopher Lukas barely touches on what that means. This is a book about nurture more than nature.

Although recognizing that his family is genetically predisposed to severe depression, Lukas nonetheless searches for understanding in the events of the individuals' lives. He clearly grasps the genetic factor and both brilliantly and emotionally describes the symptomatology, but never quite gets you inside a depressive's head to understand the actual mindset of depression.

Of course, that is a tall order. As one who also comes from a family with a history of clinical depression (though thankfully not suicide) and having fought a fierce battle with the illness myself a decade past, the only writer who I have seen achieve this is William Styron in his memoir of depression, Darkness Visible.

That said, Blue Genes is a very moving memoir of two brothers cyclically driven incredibly close and vastly apart in a world where depression and suicide were the rule, not the exception. Through reliving his memories of his older brother, Pulitzer Prize winning journalist Tony Lukas, from their early youth to Tony's suicide in 1992 at the age of 59, the author comes to understand himself better. Stretched out as it is from the Great Depression through to the Modern Age, this is a moving look at how siblings hurt, protect, and shape each other over a lifetime.



---David Norman
imagineatrium.com




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BOOK REVIEW: "Acedia & Me: A Marriage, Monks, and a Writer's Life" by Kathleen Norris

This thoughtfully written part memoir/part meditative essay centers on the idea/term "acedia," a complex and interesting word imbued with layered meanings, which traces its origin back to the early and medieval church texts, in which it is described as a "noonday demon."

Norris, through a series of personal and poignant narratives, defines this timeless concept as a kind of modern-day spiritual torpor characterized by apathy and slothfulness (both on the level of the individual and society). She explores the word by relating it to many facets of her life, in particular to her personal struggles with respect to her marriage (including seeing her husband through illness and subsequently to death) and her writing life, as well as other episodic biographical sketches.

To help clarify and demystify the concept, Norris weaves select etymological and historical accounts of acedia into the fabric of her own personal contemplations on her struggles, while at the same time illustrating the trying nature of coping with this modern-day spiritual indifference and the negative after-effects of it that permeate our culture. In the end, what we get through her search for meaning is the realization of the need for a balancing act. Whether it be through reciting the psalms in silence, or finding a spiritual connection inside an ancient religious text by Evagrius (or a modern-day thinker like Kierkegaard), or through counseling and treatment with or without drugs, the balancing of all of the options one has at his or her disposal in managing acedia or depression is ultimately a personal choice.

Through the various accounts she gives of other people's experiences in dealing with acedia, Norris illustrate how important is is to pick and choose the right support system that works. Religion, psychiatry, and psychology ultimately support this idea of balance, which leaves much room for a broader exploration into this important topic.

Norris' prose is direct and honest. This, along with the inclusion of many insightful quotations from thinkers across the centuries, makes Acedia & Me an enjoyable, worthwhile read.

--Jung Hae Chae
imagineatrium.com

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BOOK REVIEW - "The Geography of Love: A Memoir" by Glenda Burgess

A memoir of a life stuffed full with love and of losing someone special---someone so close you wonder if you’ll be able to breathe on your own once they’re gone. The first 100 pages or so read like a Harlequin romance, complete with stifling sentimentality and rose colored glasses. The writing feels class-practiced and hyperbolic - Glenda tells us that her lover turned husband looks like Gregory Peck and has the wit of Mel Brooks – and descriptions of nature and good wine are shared like intimacies but leave the reader limp and disengaged in this deep and narrow world of love supreme.

But things change for Glenda and her husband, Ken. 15 years into their happy marriage and family life Ken is diagnosed with cancer, first thought to be lung cancer, then abdominal. Ken is still described in larger than life terms by his loving wife but now the descriptions seem to better fit the man. Ken is on a collision course with a death force, and although the statistics are against him he dives soul first into the battle. Glenda too becomes more present to the reader now, we see her courage, her grace as a caretaker, and understand her desperate need for science or God to explain and reverse Ken’s fate. “Closing my eyes I prayed for a miracle. Prayer..A song in the face of loss”.

The book also deals with other sides of Glenda and Ken’s lives: her mother’s cancer, his vindication in his previous’ wife’s murder, and his relationship with his troubled daughter Jordan. Glenda’s love for Ken, however, is her focus, and his struggle with cancer is the story she tells best.

---Niamh Bushnell
imagineatrium.com



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